If you've ever taken a hike through the wildness of nature, or tried roughing it beyond human civilization, you'll know what I mean when I say life in the raw, natural world is very different from how we experience it from the comfort of our cars and homes. However, that's not the full story of being human. There's one thing you'll find sorely missing if you go out beyond the bounds society.
People.
Despite how animalistic humans can be, having come from the rawness of nature, it can seem a bit alien because we have become civilized. We have connected with other humans and through that have become invested in a civilization that has gradually moved away from nature. We have been enculturated, all our basic desires and instincts being filtered through a civilized personality so that we may get our needs met in ways acceptable to our peers.
This personality seems real enough, it seems like it could be who we are, but it's just a reflection of how we've gotten our needs met in the past. The problem is, as children we had to do all that we could just to adapt to the world. That stress is what teaches us to identify with the personality, and that identification is what leads to what we commonly know as the 'ego'.
I won't start preaching to you about how the ego is "bad" or something that you need to transcend, but I do think you'll find sticking with it rather empty. Not only does it muddy the means to ends with the ends themselves, but also it can only be who we were in the past. To limit ourselves by the past is to deny the power we have in the present. Our ego is only part of who we are; therefore, identifying with it cuts us off from the totality of who we really are.
Identifying with the totality of who we really are takes a very different mindset from identifying with the civilized personality. For one, it has to take into account consciousness. Consciousness is not a static thing, but a dynamic process, one that must be free to face every moment anew. We identify with it by being present to every new moment. We remain mindful of the present world and what we are doing in it. We identify with it by being conscious. In addition, who we really are has to take into account our core sentiments, those feelings that often go unexpressed because we could not break out of our past habits. So long as you're knee deep in the personality, any struggle or insult can knock you off-center back into the trappings of your ego. In order to escape that, you need a great deal of acceptance of your own shortcomings and the presence of mind to maintain that acceptance as your shortcomings manifest in the present. Being yourself also requires the stability to act as you really want to act despite the chaos of outer circumstances.
How you manage to do this doesn't matter, but many people have great success with meditation. I'd encourage you to try meditating 20 minutes a day to help center yourself. You may be surprised at the change, especially if you try varying it up for comparison, some days doing none, others for a solid hour. I know an avid meditator who finds meditating for an hour each morning really helps his mental clarity. As for you, try what you'd like, but if you get caught up and lose your presence of mind as soon as the phone rings, you might want to look more into meditation.
I like to say "let the past be the past, the present be the present, and the future the future." If you've got a problem from the past, that's in the past. It may have bearing on the present, but the past is already set in stone. All that baggage is done and over with; it's dead. Conversely, if you have a desire or will to do something in the future, realize that you are only experiencing that desire in the present. No wishing or dreaming will ensure it comes to pass; the only thing you can do is to plant the seed of the future through your actions in the present. All you can do is handle the present, as it's through the present you can ensure the future unfolds as you desire.
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